THE REASON WHY FRIENDSHIPS DO NOT LAST FOR TOO LONG FOR MOST PEOPLE IS BECAUSE THEY DON’T KNOW WHAT IT TAKES TO SERVICE RELATIONSHIPS
TO HAVE AND MAINTAIN FRIENDS, YOU MUST BE FRIENDLY. DON’T BE A HUMAN BURDEN THAT PEOPLE WANT TO RUN AWAY FROM
WHENEVER YOU’RE FULL OF YOURSELF, BE SURE THAT YOU WOULD BE EMPTY OF PEOPLE
LOVE, COMPASSION AND EMPATHY FUEL FRIENDSHIP AND RELATIONSHIP
TO HAVE AND MAINTAIN FRIENDS, YOU MUST BE SENSITIVE
WHEN PEOPLE FIND OUT THAT YOU’RE CROOKED, THEY LEAVE YOU ALONE
MANY MARRIAGES HAVE ENDED BECAUSE ONE STRANGER CAME FROM SOMEWHERE TO TALK TO THE HUSBAND AGAINST THE WIFE.
YOU SHOULD BE A PLEASANT PERSONALITY TO BE AROUND, A PLEASANT VOICE TO LISTEN TO.
YOUR CHOICE IS A REFLECTION OF YOUR WISDOM.
IF YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE FRIENDS, YOUR WORDS MUST BUILD UP NOT TO TEAR DOWN.
YOU WON’T BEG PEOPLE TO BE YOUR FRIENDS IF ALL THE TIME YOU ADD VALUE TO THEIR LIFE.
MANY TIMES, GENUINE PEOPLE’S INTENTIONS ARE PERFECT BUT THEIR ACTIONS MAY BE IMPERFECT
COUNTERFEIT FRIENDS DECEITFULLY TRANSFER TO THEMSELVES WHAT IS YOURS
YOUR TRUE FRIENDS WOULD BRING OUT THE BEST IN YOU WHILE THE COUNTERFEIT FRIENDS WOULD BRING OUT THE WORST IN YOU
EVIL FRIENDS ADVISE AND ENCOURAGE YOU TO DO WHAT THEY SHOULD ADVISE YOU AGAINST
THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO WANT TO GIVE YOU DISASTROUS COUNSEL AND THEY ARE GLAD TO BE ALIVE TO EXPLAIN YOUR CALAMITY
COUNTERFEIT OR EVIL FRIENDS ENGAGE YOU IN STRIFE, CONTENTION AND COMPETITION
FOR SOMEBODY TO HAVE A TRUE FRIEND, GOD HAS TO DEAL WITH PEOPLE AND DEAL WITH THAT HUMANITY
MOST PEOPLE WHO DEFRAUD PEOPLE AND EAT GOVERNMENT MONEY, THEIR WEALTH DOES NOT LAST BEYOND THEIR GENERATION.
COUNTERFEIT FRIENDS ARE SAD WHEN YOU PROGRESS, THEY ARE GLAD WHEN YOU ARE STAGNATED.
THOSE WHO YOU CANNOT CALL FRIENDS ARE THOSE WHO ARE COMFORTABLE IN THE COMPANY OF YOUR HATERS.
WHAT YOU CELEBRATE YOU ATTRACT, WHAT YOU ANTAGONIZE YOU REPEL.
THERE IS A TIME IN LIFE WHERE BOTH CONDEMNATION AND COMMENDATION ARE DISTRACTIONS.
YOUR KINDNESS TOWARDS THOSE WHO WANT YOU DEAD CAN BE MORE DISASTERS FOR THEM.
BITTERNESS IS THE FOUNDATION FOR WITCHCRAFT.
– Dr. Pastor Paul Enenche on “KNOW YOUR FRIENDS – Part 2” || Power Communion (Midweek) Service || Glory Dome, Abuja.
We have been having such a great time in the presence of the Lord in the series we’ve been on – the Knowledge series. Tonight is the second part of the subject “KNOW YOUR FRIENDS”. Church Gist. By way of objectives last week, we were understanding the necessity of knowing our friends; understanding who true friends are; understanding key thoughts about friendship. Church Gist. We want to understand counterfeit friends, understand the workmanship of friendship and then understand what to do with enemies or in fact, counterfeit friends.
I want us to go briefly over who true friends are. Who do you call a friend?
1. A friend is a companion who is at home in your company.
2. A friend is one who goes with you on important life’s journey.
3. A friend is one who can be trusted with confidential assignments of your life
4. A friend is one with whom you can speak closely, comfortably, intimately and harmoniously.
5. A friend is one with whom you can speak sincerely, openly and frankly, without pretense or deception.
6. A friend is one who is as your own soul to you; you literally treat him as you will treat yourself.
7. A friend is one who is quick to arrive and surround you in seasons of challenge and adversity.
8. A friend is one who cooperates with you to frustrate the agenda of the enemy and his agents against your life.
9. A friend is one who makes your burden their burden, your concern is their concern and your pain is their pain; that will make them to fast and pray for your rescue.
10. A friend is one who is trusted; you have confidence in his reliability and faithfulness.
11. A friend is one who loves you at all times; he loves you through all the seasons of your life. Church Gist. Some love you because times are good, a friend loves you at all times.
12. A friend is one who is friendly with you, not hostile to you.
13. A friend is one who may hurt you to save or deliver you but the enemy would hail you to ruin you.
14. A friend is one who is committed to giving you hearty counsels; counsel from the heart.
15. A friend is one who is committed to the sharpening of your life’s gifts and potentials.
16. A friend is one in whose company you’re free to celebrate, eat and drink.
17. A friend is one who is truly excited at your progress and success in life.
18. A friend is one who defends your interest and concerns at all seasons of your life, whether you are there or not.
19. A friend is one who does not work in concert with your enemies to undermine your life, destiny or authority.
20. A friend is one who cares enough to attempt to save your life when they think you are going overboard.
21. A friend is one who multiplies your joy and diminishes your sorrow.
22. A friend is one who shares your interests, conviction and character.
From what we can see, real friends are very few, but they exist. I am going to proceed this evening on the workmanship of friendship before we go into counterfeit friends and so on. Church Gist. We are going to look at the workmanship of friendship. What do you do to service true friendship and relationship? What do you do to have and to maintain friendship? Without any doubt, it goes with that saying that relationship and friendship require workmanship. Church Gist. That is, if you’re to have friends, you work on it. Relationship between the husband and the wife requires workmanship. So, what do you do to service true relationship or friendship?
1. You must be friendly. To have and maintain friends, you must be friendly. Proverbs 18:24. You must be friendly means, you must be goodly and nicely disposed. You must be a companion to be around with. Church Gist. To be a friend, you must be someone that somebody wants to be around with. You must refuse to be a human burden or human concern, someone that people want to run from. Church Gist. There are human beings who have made themselves such that when you come around them, you want to run.
2. You must have accomodation for others in your life. All I’m saying is, ‘what does it take to have and maintain friends?’ and I am talking of also the husband and wife relationship. Church Gist. You must have accommodation for others in your life. Philippians 2:4. You must avoid the life that is self centered, self-focused and self-absorbed – everything is all about you. I told you the story of the marriage my wife attended many years ago, young fine lady and young fine man, marriage lasted for only 7 days. Church Gist. The woman came, locked herself up in the room and by the time she was out of the room, the marriage was over. Self-centered, self-focused, self-absorbed. Whenever you’re full of yourself, be sure that you would be empty of people. Church Gist. When what matters to you is what matters to you and what matter to others don’t matter to you, you would be empty of people.
3. You must be generous. A generous giver. When I say generous, some people are thinking maybe I am talking about money. Proverbs 19:6. 1 Samuel 30:6. Church Gist. When I say be a generous giver, it is not all givings that is cash, there are givings that are kind. A kind affirmation, be generous in affirmation, “you’re looking nice, you’re looking sharp, you’re so sharp”. Be kind, be generous in affirmation. Church Gist. Be generous in commendation. Be generous in counsel and advice. Be generous in paying compliments.
4. You must be sensitive to the needs of others. You have eyes that see, ears that hear or listens and a heart that feels. Genesis 40:6-8. Ezekiel 3:15. You see, love, compassion, empathy fuel friendship and relationship. Church Gist. Whether it’s relationship between husband and wife or the friendship of man and his friend, love, compassion and empathy fuel relationship. When you feel what people feel, when you’re touched by what touches them, your relationship is strengthened. You saw someone and he’s looking sad, no comments, he’s looking duller than usual, no comments and he’s your friend. I mean, there are people who would just get so petty and say, “why are you angry at me? Did I do you anything?” Meanwhile the person just got a news from home or maybe the mother has a challenge or something and the problem has nothing to do with you. Church Gist. He’s trying to resolve something within themselves and you’re thinking of yourself, not them. Instead of saying, “is everything okay with you? Is there something you would like us to pray about?” You just start ranting, “why are you frowning for me? Is it because you saw me? Okay, bye. See you later”. That’s how self-centered people are. Church Gist. Meanwhile the person was looking for somebody to share a burden with and this one has turned back thinking only of himself. “Madam, why are you not greeting me this morning?” Husband is talking to wife and vice-versa but this person is looking to be relieved. Church Gist. To have and maintain friends, you must be sensitive, that’s why friendship doesn’t last for most people for too long because they don’t know what it takes to service relationship. They don’t know the workmanship of friendship.
5. There must be the pureness of heart. That is, you’re real and sincere, not crooked and insincere to the person you call friend. Proverbs 22:11. Church Gist. Pure heart, being real, being sincere, not crooked. When people find out that you’re crooked, they leave you alone.
6. You must possess a grace-filled lip(s) Proverbs 22:11
…The grace of his lips. What is that? Your word should minister grace to your hearers, it should minister grace to your loved ones, minister ease Ephesians 4:29. There are those who don’t know how to talk except in quarrelsome tones. Some of you who have a high tone of voice, it’s good you are very conscious of it so that someone doesn’t think that you are shouting at them or quarreling with them with your tone of voice. ‘Good Morning Sir’, ‘Yes’! ‘How are you today? How was work today’? ‘What’? If you are going to have friends your words must build up not tear down. Church Gist. There are men who tore down their wives with their mouths, the woman became a shadow of herself by what the man kept on talking: ‘Useless woman, see your mate! It’s not your fault, I’m the one who married you’! The person talking like that is he not the worst dummy on earth? If you are not a dummy, who made the choice? With your two eyes, you saw everyone you found that one. Your choice is a reflection of your wisdom, it’s a total reflection. You confirm your stupidity when you say that you have chosen calamity. Are you hearing what I’m saying here? Your words should build not tear.
There are people, the moment they sight their so-called friend, accusation! ‘I called you ten times you didn’t reply, is anything wrong’? Not knowing that the person was away from the phone, the person may be praying at that time. The words are attack all the time. Your words should lift up and not pull down, you should be a pleasant personality to be around, a pleasant speaker – Pleasant voice to listen to. Church Gist. How many of you know that there are two ways you can say yes? And it means different things. ‘Yes, Yes Sir’, ‘Yeeees’! One you are trying to understand, the other one you are trying to quarrel. And there are those who are not trying to quarrel but that ‘Yeeees’ is quarrelsome. How many parents tore down their children with their words? ‘Good for nothing! At this age, you are still here’! You want to have friends? And you want to maintain friends, you must have grace-filled lips.
7. To have friends and to maintain friends, you must make a positive difference
Add tangible value to the lives of those around you. Let them be able to trace a certain progress, success, positive action to their relationship with you Acts 4:13. You won’t beg people to be your friends if all the time you add value to their life. You do things for them they can’t forget. Don’t waste your lifetime with only gisting and gossiping people and you call that friendship. When we grew up, young men following the Lord, when you met your friend, the first thing is, ‘How are you bro? I was able to do three hours non-stop in prayer’. ‘Wow! I did about two and half hours’. Church Gist. Then the next question is: ‘Have you read the recent book of Oswald J. Smith? The Man God uses! What of: Leonard Ravenhill, Why Revival Tarries? Have you read the book of Leonard Ravenhill, the one titled: ‘Sodom have no Bible? If Sodom had no Bible and God could judge them, we who have Bible, we have nowhere to hide. Now, I’m mentioning books that you are hearing for the first time, those were the kind of things we were using to sharpen ourselves. That was what real friendship was then, where your life is shifted forward by an encounter with a friend, where they gave you a piece of information.
We used to read: ‘Herald of His Coming’ in those days. Have you read of Samuel Logan Brengle of the Salvation Army? Oh! You haven’t heard his name? Go and read about him. Are you hearing what I’m saying here today? Those were the kind of things we used to sharpen ourselves. If anybody is not adding anything to your life and you are not adding anything to their life, both of you are wasting each other’s time. Every devil in hell is aware that my wife here has massive added value to herself by contact – Graces, giftings, impartations and vice versa. I am a softer person, I had the grace to make you laugh but at a time in my life, I was frowning almost permanently. Church Gist. One day, we were in a meeting and I was sitting with a friend and there was one seat in the front and they came to me and said: ‘Can you come up there is a seat in front for you’? And I said, ‘What of this man’? Does he have a seat in front’? They said: ‘No, it is only one seat left’! And I said, ‘Okay, I am so sorry, I will have to sit with him, please just give that seat to another person’! And I sat with him. After a short while because of what I said, they had to go and create a seat and they created a second seat and both of us went together. When we sat down the man said to me, ‘What you have done for me today, there is nothing under Heaven you will do against me. If for any reason that will be an issue to me’! That is, I value you so much, I don’t want to shine without you, let’s move together.
-I prophesy tonight, God will give you people and give you to people whose life you will add value to.
8. You must avoid the ministry of gossips, whisperers and sowers of strife
‘Is this person truly your friend? Are you sure? Proverbs 16:28. These two people have been friends since childhood, one devil agent came in between them and scattered them Proverbs 17:9. There is something that I think this man is doing to you that you are not aware, this kind of people, they have divided asunder brethren – Brothers in the Church, brethren that are good to each other. Somebody just steps in, tore them asunder, this kind of people they have torn asunder husbands and wives. Church Gist. They say something to the wife against the man and then say something to the man against the wife, the exact opposite. These kinds of people, they have scattered families – Husbands, wives, children at war. These kinds of people, friends, people who grew up, they never quarreled, somebody stepped into their midst! And in case you think they are very far, they are very very plenty everywhere, they are in Church. These Judas Iscariot can be in Church, they are in departments, in ushering, in choir, they are everywhere. Their assignment is if they see the goodness of your relationship they are angry, even among Pastors they exist. Oh Yes! They see the goodness of your relationship, they scatter it.
Many years ago, a woman came to talk to me about my wife; oh yes! This is like 26 years ago, at the beginning of the Ministry. You see, I came to tell you, your wife this your wife that’! ‘Shut up’! I looked at her! I don’t know what it was, I can’t remember, I said, ‘Who are you? My wife, I know, you I don’t know, between the two of you who should I believe’? If I see that person, I can’t recognise that person, that was my first and last time and she disappeared forever’! I don’t think Ministry was even two years yet, I don’t think the person was even a member’! From Jos! Agent of the devil! ‘I’m not trying to report your wife oo but erm’! This is another case now. How many marriages have ended because one stranger came from somewhere to talk to the husband against the wife? Many! ‘Me and your wife we were selling the same market in the market, she is a disgrace to you oo’. ‘My wife’? ‘Go and ask everybody in the market’! Nothing like that. The man is already racking without finding anything out. ‘I don’t think this man that you called your friend is your friend, he is not your friend at all oo.
-I prophesy to you, anybody that is wrong for your life, God will unveil them to you.
9. You must learn to forgive. It has always been said that “to err is human, to forgive is divine”. Mark 11:25. When you walk with people, marching their feet by mistake is very possible. Church Gist. Have you stamped on somebody’s feet before and you didn’t mean it? Did they kill you? That is possible, very possible but that doesn’t mean quarrel. Many times, genuine people’s intentions are perfect but their actions may be imperfect. The wife may think she’s trying to protect her husband by her action but the action doesn’t seem perfect. Church Gist. The woman may be trying to pass across an information but it’s appearing quarrelsome. So, you must learn to forgive. Forgiveness is the background for friendship. Look at the teeth and the tongue, most times, the teeth mistakenly bite the tongue but they don’t divorce from the mouth. Praise the Lord!
10. You must rely on the help of God. The Bible said, “a man can receive nothing except it be given to him from above”. Church Gist. If you’re going to have anything substantial, lasting, durable. God can give you quality people as gifts into your life. Ephesians 4:8.
Having said that, let us go to counterfeit friends. How to know counterfeit friends, friends that are not friends. Call it counterfeit or evil friends.
1. Counterfeit or evil friends betray your trust and destroy your confidence in them. Judges 14:20. Church Gist. While Samson was going out in courtship, his friend was eyeing the woman, Samson did not know. When there was slight problem, he dived.
2. Counterfeit or evil friends divert the loyalty of your loved ones or followership. The person that you introduced your friend to who is a billionaire, who was trying to do business with you, next thing you heard was that you’re no longer in the business and that he’s now in business with your friend. Church Gist. That’s a counterfeit, evil friend. Judges 14:20. I am aware of two brethren many years ago, the brother escorted his friend to visit his fiancee, the shortness of the long story, your guess is as good as mine, the next thing they knew was the ‘escorter’ took over the girl from the ‘escortee’, serious crisis. “All I said was for him to escort to the house of the girl that I want to marry”. Church Gist. Haven’t you heard of it before? That somebody married somebody’s best friend. This story I’m telling you now, I’m aware of it, I know all the 3 people involved. Those are evil, bad friends.
3. Counterfeit or evil friends divert your inheritance and possession. They deceitfully transfer to themselves what is yours. Church Gist. “Help me transact this land paper”, before you know it, it’s gone. “Help me deal on this matter”, before you know it, you’re just there empty-handed. Judges 14:20.
– I prophesy to you today, counterfeit and evil friends, God will deliver you from them permanently!
4. Counterfeit or evil friends give destructive and disastrous counsel. The advice and counsel they give you can destroy if you open your ears and hear them. That was the evil friend that Amnon had. 2 Samuel 13:3. Church Gist. Amnon had an evil friend called Jonadab, he taught him how to rape his sister. There are people who have given counsels that led to death. There are those who counseled their friends that broke their homes. “This is what my husband does for me, does your own not do that for you? What are you waiting for?”.
5. Counterfeit or evil friends bring out the worst of you. They empower and encourage your weakness. Your true friends would bring out the best in you, the counterfeit friends would bring out the worst in you. Church Gist. That was what Amnon experienced in the hands of Jonadab. 2 Samuel 13:3. If you’re the friend of anyone and your life is becoming worse and worse, spiritual life is drying up and drying up, you can more easily gossip people now, then you’re connected to an evil friend, a counterfeit friend.
6. Counterfeit or evil friends give you the confidence to do wrong. They embolden you to do evil. They advise and encourage you to do what they should advise you against. Church Gist. Something like, “have you smoked before? Somebody as matured as you hasn’t smoked before?; In this world, you’re still calling yourself a virgin? Well done, virgin Mary; smoke small, it won’t harm you”. One of my friends was encouraging me to smoke 38 years ago in secondary school. Church Gist. I didn’t know how to do it, so he was totally frustrated. When I gave my life to Christ, he was the first person I went to catch. Very rugged, brutal guy. He’s a Christian till tomorrow.
7. Counterfeit or evil friends are glad to explain your failures to others. The same person who encouraged you to do the wrong is explaining to people the disastrous outcome of their counsel. Church Gist. That was what Jonadab did to Amnon. After Amnon raped Tamar and Absalom killed Amnon and there was crisis in the house of David and David began to weep and to cry, Jonadab who advised Amnon was the first person to open his mouth to David and said, “Sir, don’t cry”. 2 Samuel 13:31-33. A king’s son that is supposed to be your friend and you said he shouldn’t take it to heart. That was how ‘good’ that bad boy was. Church Gist. “Don’t have a sleepless night over this death, don’t let it pain you, he was the one who raped somebody’s sister and they killed him for raping somebody’s sister, it shouldn’t be your concern king. No matter what, people do bad and they reap the consequences”. Church Gist. Meanwhile, he was the one who gave him the advice of what to do.
There are people who want to give you disastrous counsel and they are glad to be alive to explain your calamity.
– may you never have such people in your life!
– lift your right hand, say, “Father, I receive total deliverance from evil and counterfeit friends. I receive it now!”
8. Evil or counterfeit friends deal treacherously and deceitfully. They are cunningly manipulative and deceptive. You are true to them but they are not true to you. Lamentations 1:1-2. Church Gist. When you see someone around your life that is so manipulative and so cunning, treacherous and deceptive, run for your life.
9. Counterfeit or evil friends organize the hurt, injury and destruction of their victims. “What happened to you?” “This was the wound I received in the house of my friends”. Zechariah 13:6. Church Gist. It is one thing to be wounded in the house of your enemy, that’s normal but to be wounded but to be wounded in the house of somebody you call friend? How many young ladies have experienced terror in the house of so-called male friends?
10. Counterfeit or evil friends use what they know about you to conspire with the enemy to bring destruction.
– May God never allow any such person around your life!
That was what Judas Iscariot did. The knowledge of the fact that he knows where Jesus should be at that time. Luke 22:47-48. Church Gist. “Are you looking for Jesus? Follow me. We are so tight, I can embrace, hug and kiss him, that’s how close we are. Even, I have some of his money in my pocket right now. I know where he would be at this time. He would be at the mountain of Olives now. It’s a prayer time for us in the evening” and they actually came and met him there. Church Gist. It is God who protects us oh. Because as we live in this world, you don’t know who is who. It’s not written on anybody’s head, “evil friend; counterfeit friend”. Especially in this age of communication. All manner of terrible things. Church Gist. You thought you’re talking to somebody, he’s recording you. Wicked-hearted entities. But the Bible said, “who is he that can harm you if you be followers of that which is good”.
One day, somebody called me on the phone and as I was about to answer, my phone immediately said, “call being recorded”. So, I said, “what’s happening? I’ve just been informed that you’re recording the call”. Church Gist. He said, “I’m sorry sir, I’m just recording the declarations that you’re going to make on my life”. I said, “Really? Without informing me? Without my permission?”
– you would never be a victim of this endtime demonic agenda!
You know what destroyed Samson? Being close to the wrong person was one issue but vomiting out a secret of his life, the altar of his relationship with God, the secret that birthed him was the major matter. Church Gist. That was what the woman carried. “If they want to kill you, what can they do to you?” He said, “there’s hair on my head that has not been cut”. She said, “alright. I will show you that I will cut it”. She didn’t say that out. What again? That is, friend using what friend said to destroy them.
I was trying to settle a quarrel between a man and his wife sometime ago and the man was trying to run mad. Church Gist. “What is it?” He said, “what I told my wife in confidence, she didn’t ask me, I was the one who told her, she’s now using it to insult me and telling other people about it”.
– somebody say a loud Amen!
They use what they know to conspire with the enemy. 1 Peter 3:13.
– If you don’t mean evil towards anybody and they try to orchestrate evil against your life, my life, our lives, against your family and your destiny, I stand by the mantle of God on this altar, I decree, they shall be destroyed!
11. Counterfeit or evil friends engage you in strife, contention and competition. Genesis 13:5-8. For some of them, life is a competition, it’s contention and strife. You try to achieve this, they try to achieve the other. Church Gist. And you know such people, when you begin to tell them of your results, they would tell you another thing to balance it. “Oh. Thank God, last Sunday, we had an overflow”. “Oh yes. Our own overflow was 3 times”. I’m just using an example that I’m familiar with (smiles). “My son got 3 As and 5 Bs”. “Oh. My own was 5 As”. Church Gist. Human beings eh. In fact, for somebody to have a true friend, God has to deal with people and deal with that humanity. Strife, competition, contention.
12. Counterfeit or evil friends are sad with your success and glad with your failure.
If you announce that you succeeded, you won’t see the excitement you are expected to see. ‘I just got a visa, you won’t see that happiness. ‘I just got an invitation, you won’t see that happiness’! They instantly begin to think of themselves, so what happened to me? Why didn’t I have and me I have been applying too’! They are sad when you progress, they are glad when you are stagnated. Church Gist. They are very happy for you to share with them temptations, they are very happy. ‘I don’t know what I did to the devil, witches in my village they won’t leave me alone’. ‘They say: ‘Sister, don’t worry we will war it together that devil is a bastard’ (Shedding fake tears) – I’m telling you, we will deal with him, we are here, I’m here for you’! ‘Sister, I just want to let you know, praise the Lord! In fact, right now, I have three suitors! Firebrand Brothers I am wondering which one to choose now and I can tell you something else none of them is poor oo’! ‘Eeeh! How manage are you sure’? ‘Pray very well oh, there are some of these people they are ritualist oo, they also go to Church looking for who to marry’! When you were sharing problem they were excited with you, when you begin to share progress face changed.
-May God deliver you from such people! And bring the right person into your life!
There are people who are good friends until success arrives, then they change sides. All you need is to just have that heart, that when you wish somebody well, wellness multiplies. Church Gist. What you are happy about happens for you, life is a seed. What you celebrate you attract, what you antagonize you repel. Somebody say Amen!
Finally tonight, what do you do about enemies and even counterfeit friends?
1. Decide and determine never to be distracted from your focus because most of these people are out on assignment to distract your focus
They are on a demonic assignment, some of them like Judas are to distract your focus, to ensure that you don’t reach where God wants you to reach in life Proverbs 4:23-26. These people want to move you out of the way. Here you are facing your road and somebody say: ‘Look at you, ‘K-leg’, dress does not fit sef, other people are wearing shoe, don’t wear shoe wear sandals’. Church Gist. And then you leave the road and you go and meet them. Be careful with yourself! Have you seen anybody wrong in Olympics? He’s running and somebody says: ‘Oh! See this bad man you will be the last, you won’t take the first and he comes out of the track and says: ‘Be careful with yourself’! When I finish the race, I will meet you. And another person says: ‘Up you’! You are winning man, and he says, ‘Thank you boy, thank you. I will come and show you the trophy when I finish’! What is your diagnosis of that man? He has already failed! There is a time in life where both condemnation and commendation are distractions. Where somebody says you are not doing well and you are paying so much attention, as somebody says you are doing too well and you are paying too much attention – they become distractions. You are headed somewhere in life that enemy or counterfeit friend, leave him! When you reach where you want to reach you can answer him later.
2. Decide to dream bigger dreams and see bigger visions for your life and destiny.
The more they confront you the more they consider themselves your enemies Genesis 37:5-9.
And Joseph dreamed a dream. You know the story when they hated him for his dreams, he dreamed the dream bigger. Decide to dream bigger! Dream bigger dreams! And see bigger visions for your life and your destiny. Church Gist. The reason they consider themselves your enemies is to drop your dreams, to dwindle your vision so that you can narrow down your vision and those human beings become your vision.
3. Decide to dare and do bigger things, take larger steps
If there are things they think you have achieved in life that is causing them to hate you, dare bigger things, take larger steps. In Mark 10:46-48, when blind Bartimaeus was running after Jesus and the people told him to shut up, he cried out the more! That’s how to do with the devil and his agent, bigger things larger steps, stronger strides!
4. Maintain good distance from your detractors and distractions
Good distance from counterfeit friends, friendly enemies. It is called ‘Frenemy’. Matthew 5:29-30. Now I have never seen one person who plucked out his physical eyes or hand because of offence but that’s what Jesus is saying to us and that is figurative. No matter how close a person is to your life and destiny, if they are trying to hinder your destiny, step off! Give them space! Church Gist. Give them distance! It is better to walk alone than to walk with the wrong crowd. Am I communicating? There is nothing compulsory in this life, you were not born with anybody, don’t die with anybody! See, there are people who just render their lives useless because a friend or a so-called person is forcing themselves on their lives. Don’t give allowance to them in your space, they are not your friends they are not your enemies, you know them when they are coming, after you have greeted very well: ‘So how is life? How is family? You are doing good? Please, give me a few minutes, we will speak later’. You don’t move like they are enemy, no! ‘Everything okay? Wow! Long time? Yeah! Long time! Bless you, so we will see later!
Don’t give ear to what they have to say.
Somebody sent me a video clip of somebody preaching garbage and rubbish and all manner of heresies. He said, ‘How can people talk like this? I said you are the one who have time for rubbish, you are the one who have time for trash, by the time you see the title of the message trash it. Thank God for technology, it has ‘Delete it’, it has all manner, trash it and warn anybody sending you such messages – ‘I don’t have time for this’! If they keep on sending you, block the person. Blocking is the same thing as cut off the hand of… it’s the same thing! Church Gist. There are people you need to block and they need to know you blocked them. Halleluyah! And you must tell them the reason why if they care to know. Am I communicating at all? You are the one who have time for trash for garbage! I don’t have one second for such trash, by the time I see the title highest three or four seconds and it is trash, to hell, back to hell! My mind is too loaded with matter to have occupation for garbage.
5. Decide not to empower your enemies with underperformance or mediocrity Daniel 6:1-4
When they tried to find what they could use against Daniel, they found nothing. Let those who want you dead be struggling to find what to use against you. Church Gist. Let them struggle!
6. This is difficult but it’s possible! – Show them kindness where possible
And what are you doing? You are acting as if you are not aware of their atrocities, behave like that! And we are commanded so! Show them kindness where necessary. Behave as though you are not aware of their atrocious and vexatious behaviour. But this is the key: Your kindness to them can be more judgmental than judgmental prayers. Your kindness! Proverbs 25:21. So two things are happening when you are kind to them: God is judging them and God is rewarding you. The very thing they don’t want you to become, God is enhancing you to become while fire is burning on their head. ‘Hello Sir, how is the work’? Church Gist. That’s the man that sacked you from work. ‘Fine, I just called you to find out how work is doing and how is the family doing? Please, my love and regards to everybody! And he will worsen his case if you say: ‘I’m praying for you’! You send recharge cards to the person who hates you with a passion, you bought a Christmas card’! You are fulfilling Scriptural injunction. Am I communicating? That thing will do three things for you, the first thing to do is: To heap coals of fires on their head. Second thing it will do for you is to cause God to reward and bless you. The third thing it will do for you is to liberate you from bitterness. So the weight of the bitterness is reducing as you are generous towards them. In so doing, you will heap coals of fire! Your kindness towards those who want you dead can be more disasters for them. Halleluyah!
One of those who hate us with passion was a major beneficiary of our welfare outreach last month and is a major beneficiary very frequently, they come publicly and also come Nicodemusly. Church Gist. The other day I told my wife and said: ‘Who is this’? She said: ‘From so, so and so place’! I say: ‘Wow! You are welcome, we are happy!
7. Pray for them where necessary
I know that what you want to do the most is to pray against them, I’m aware but pray for them. Now this is not the category of witches and wizards! This one! Anyone who is a witch and a wizard, when you pray against witches and wizards, that prayer will cover those ones but these are the ones that see you they get angry, irritated, agitated. They want you to know they don’t like you. ‘Father, I pray for Sister Malice, I am asking wherever Sister Malice is, Brother wickedness help them Lord to know you the true God! Church Gist. Rescue them from hell! Help them to realise that what they are doing is disaster. Can I ask you a question? Is it possible for anybody except he is satan because satan knew what he was doing in Heaven and he knew the consequences of it. Apart from anybody who is satan directly or who is possessed with the spirit of satan, is in an exam hall, he knows the right answer and wrote the wrong one. Since you were born have you had such a thing? This is the correct answer that will make me pass and then you write the wrong one! ‘To hell with that teacher! He thinks he can insult me to write what he wants me to write, I will write my own to see if he will give me the wrong mark’! That is ‘Colorization’! Am I communicating?
Most people who do some of these things they don’t know the damage they are bringing to their destiny, the damage on earth and the damage in eternity. They don’t know what they are doing to their life, to their generation. Most people who defraud people, cheat people, eat government money, their wealth does not last beyond their generation – Some of them, their children suffer everlasting harassment, if only they knew they wouldn’t have done it. That is one of the bases of our prayer! ‘Let them realise themselves in their lifetime’! Some of them can get one encounter overnight, but when they have made up their mind to go to hell, that prayer is for your Salvation and the same prayer is for their damnation. And God turned the captivity of Job, when he prayed for his friends. Church Gist. Praying for those who hate you! Now I’m sure you know the friends of Job we are talking about. The same people who were busy castigating Job, busy worsening… Job called them, ‘Physicians of no value’! He said: ‘Miserable counselors’, those are two titles he gave them. ‘Doctors that have no prescription’! That’s for all of you! Miserable counselors, those who gave you counsel to worsen your misery! That’s what Job called them! Yet he prayed for them and God turned the captivity of those people, is that what He said? God turned the captivity as Job prayed for them! Is that what He said? God changed their story as Job prayed for them! Who was the beneficiary of the prayer? Job was the beneficiary of the prayer he prayed for those who hurt him. And if those people don’t change their damnation is confirmed. Halleluyah! Pray against all the witches to wizards to cultists and all of that, but also you are not sure whether they are witches or wizards even though bitterness is the foundation for witchcraft – It’s elementary witchcraft! But provided they are still in elementary class, we can pray for them.
Beloveth brothers and sisters! I welcome you to the life of living in the fullness of God’s help by knowing who your friends are. I want to let you know that the best God can do for you is to position around your life the right people and the right people exist. Right wife! Right husband! Right relationship and friend! We are going to pray: ‘Father! You, position in my life this right people! Another thing He would want you to know which I have not mentioned: Another way to know those who you cannot call friends are those who are comfortable in the company of your haters – Those who hate you like they want to kill you! These people talk about you in their presence, these people want to plan what they want to plan against you in the presence of these people but they see nothing wrong, they are okay and comfortable – Those are enemies in development! Undercover enemy! There are enemies that are obvious and their are enemies that are oblivious! Undercover subterranean enemies! Submarine! Flying under radar!
-You will never find them ruin your life.
—–PRAYER——-
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